Al Gore Opens Mouth, Increases Carbon Footprint

By Selwyn Duke

Speaking today to COOL-IT (Communists for Only Onerous and Lofty Industrial Taxation) in Nome, Alaska, former vice-president Al Gore criticized the United States’ failure to adequately address climate change. Mr. Gore warned of future consequences of inaction while emphasizing that we have already felt the effects of a lamentably low suicide rate. Gore mentioned the extinction of species, the melting of the polar ice caps, and his loss of Florida in the 2000 presidential election. Said Gore,

Florida is a very hot state – even in November. And members of lower-income socio-economic groups – who are most likely to vote Democrat – often can’t afford air-conditioning. Now, if you’re sitting around in a pool of your own sweat drinking Thunderbird, what are the chances you’ll be motivated to vote on election day?

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I always enjoy Selwyn Duke’s writings. Read the rest of his article to be sure and catch his drift.