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Sunday, November 04, 2007

Elephant Herd Finally Returns

A while back I was presented with the following story, but it had consequences.

Sally was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be a liberal Democrat, very much in favor of redistributing wealth.

She was deeply ashamed her father was a staunch Republican. Based on the lectures she had heard and chats with professors, Sally felt her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he earned.

One day she challenged her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and more welfare programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father.

He responded by asking how she was doing in school. Taken aback, she answered haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA. She let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.

Her father listened and then asked, "How is your friend Audrey doing?" She replied, "Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, never studies, and barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus. For her, college is a blast. She's invited to all the parties and lots of time she doesn't even show up for class because she's too hung over."

Her wise father suggested, "Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who has only a 2.0? That way you both will have a 3.0 GPA which certainly would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA."

Sally, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, "That wouldn't be fair! I have worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!"

The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, "Welcome to the Republican party."

After reading this story, they asked if I agreed with it. I said, "Definitely! I believe in conserving what I have!" That was a mistake. They sent me away for diversity training and rehabilitation. However, try as they might, they could not convince me that it was fair. But when I discovered all the diversity trainers had 2.0 GPAs in college, they kicked me out! So I’m back, but not rehabilitated!

Elephant Herd

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